5 Steps to Writing Successful Erotic Fiction

Warning: Don't Drink While Reading This

Also, this weeks fannish5 (which was an AWESOME prompt):

If you could erase five characters from any fandom, who would you choose?

1.) Excalibur, Soul Eater. Seriously, the bastard DOES NOT HAVE A PERSONALITY BEYOND ANNOYING.

2.) Aang, Avatar. My first thought was 'well, it's Aang. The shows sort-of about him and while I don't like his personality type, he's a good character to bring together characters I actually care about.' And then I read jakia 's reasoning: "Can you imagine Avatar without the Avatar? It would have been Zuko struggling to regain his honor, while Sokka and Katara and Toph were badass awesome rebel fighters. Think about that, and then tell me you wouldn't want to watch it."

To which I will add: you and I both fucking know that if that show had aired, Rebel Leader Katara and Future Fire Lord Zuko would have been canon.

3.) Gaius Baltar, BSG. Yeah, I know, he was in the old show and very instrumental in getting stuff to happen. But goddamn I got sick of seeing him on my computer screen. Instead of being erased, I'd settle for having his screentime halved.

4.) Jason Stackhouse, True Blood. Seriously, what purpose does Jason serve besides scarring my eyes with horrible sex? *crickets chirp*

5.) That little dog who wouldn't let Sarah cross the bridge in Labyrinth.

So, I was recently hanging out with a friend and since BSG is ending, and I'm heard a lot of yelling from my flist, I thought I might as well catch up and watch the ending.

(Speaking of, does anyone know when BSG is uploaded to hulu? Because I'd like to watch ( normally I have a no-spoiler policy, but for this show I am spoiled like rotten milk )

Okay, so I was going to do that icon meme thing again, only in the middle I changed my default and adeleted a whole bunch of icons and uploaded some more so have some random crack tastic cross-over sentences since I'm not going to bother rewriting:

( cut for cracky-ficcage )

But how did I not know ( spoilers )

(I was informed via this picspam.)

1) Make a list of 15 characters first, and keep it to yourself for the moment. (That way you're not leading the questions asked to fit the characters.)

2) Ask people to post questions in the comments.

Here are my people:

1.) Maka, Soul Eater

2.) Death Scythe, Soul Eater

3.) Olive, Pushing Daises

4.) Hakate Kakashi, Naruto

5.) Haruno Sakura, Naruto

6.) Katara, Avatar

7.) Loreleai, Gilmore Girls

8.) Tsunade, Naruto

9.) Starbuck, BSG

10.) Sai, Naruto

11.) Sokka, Avatar

12.) Zuko, Avatar

13.) Orihime, Bleach

14.) Deidara, Naruto

15.) Ishida, Bleach

Your questions and answers:

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ETA: Sorry the formatting got all screwy. But it's readable, so I'm just going to leave it.

This was a fun meme, so I decided to do it again with questions from the_sun_is_up :

Comment to this post and I will ask you about three top 5(s) (ships, songs, non-canon ships, movies, characters etc etc... whatever) that I would like to see you post about.

I was asked about top top five fictional weapons (not superpowers, actual weapons like swords and guns and stuff), top five moments of OTPness (any ships), and top five coolest hairstyles on a fictional character.

Top 5 Fictional Weapons:( If I Were A Weapon... )

Top 5 moments of OTP-ness (any ship):( Spoilers for Avatar, Bones, HIMYM, Soul Eater and Firefly )

Top 5 Coolest Hairstyles On A Fictional Character:

( Let Down Your Hair.... )

gacked from lalita_b too long ago.

Comment to this post and I will ask you about three top 5(s) (ships, songs, non-canon ships, movies, characters etc etc... whatever) that I would like to see you post about. I was asked about my top 5 characters I hate, top 5 fictional crushes and top 5 favorite anime openings

Top 5 Crushes:

( I Wouldn't Kick Them Out Of Bed For Eating Crackers )

Top 5 Most Hated Characters:

( DIAF, You BASTARDS! )

Top 5 anime openings

I was actually thinking this was going to be harder than it was. Typically, I hate anime openings (I think I sat through FMA's once, and then never again, and Naruto's makes me want to stab my ears out). However, it turns out that there are several openings that are awesome:

( The Flying Pussyfoot Departs.... )

From today's fannish5 :

Five canon events that would cause you to leave a fandom (or at least think seriously about it).

1.) They turn my favorite character into someone I don't recognize and don't like (Veronica Mars, BSG).

2.) They turn my favorite character into a voiceless prize (Avatar).

3.) After giving me faith that female characters in Shounen manga don't have to be sidelined and treated as less-than, they sideline their female characters and treat them as less-than (Black Cat).

4.) The writer's think that their audience is comprised solely of brain-damaged eight year olds (Heroes).

5.) It is impossible to believe that the villain hasn't been killed, yet they are still running around being worshiped as gods (BSG, Heroes, Alias).

</lj>

The fannish5question this week was "List the five most moving fictional funerals."

However, I couldn't think of five funerals, much less ones that were moving. So I decided on "5 most moving death scenes."

( Spoilers for FMA, BSG, Sabriel, Angel, Naruto )

Shibboleth is a great word.

Rooks by Sheerwater (download here) is totally an Uchiha Itachi song.

I See Red by Ur Huh Her (download here) is totally a Haruno Sakura song.

I've been meaning to do the last couple fannish5 :

Five characters that replaced departing characters, and whether you considered each a gain or a loss.

1.) Tara. While I think Tara is awesome and I really loved her from the whole 'lesbian on primetime' factor and how nonchalant they were about that relationship, I kinda adored Oz, and personally connected more with the 'cool musician falls for pretty geek girl' storyline than the lesbian witches one. Loss. (...and bellzooks will be burning me at the stake shortly...)

2.) Wesley. While Doyle was possibly the best person for Cordelia, ever, his death was kinda awesome in that it gave her visions which resulted in even more awesome character development from her, and lead to Wesley having a FANTASTIC and realistic character arc. (Seriously, think about who he was introduced as, and who he became.)

3.) Whoever ends up replacing Zach. The cluster fuck that was him being written off the show automatically means that whoever replaces him won't be as awesome. Loss.

4.) Tori. The fact that they didn't do more with Billy was bad, but the fact that they wrote him off in a way that made me hate everyone in that love triangle... is actually par for the course with BSG. Anyway, back to the point, Billy was awesome and Tori is an evil Cylon who killed Cally in order to fuck the Chief. Die, bitch.

5.) Zach. Despite his few cute moments, he was nowhere near as perfect for Lane as Dave (aka, Seth Cohen with a guitar. I mean, freaking Seth Cohen.)

Name your five favorite fanfic tropes. (Assume that these are tropes written well.)

1.) Two characters being ordered to work together on something, and UST leading to RST results.

2.) One character, while sleeping in the same bed as another, cuddles and/or fondles the other in a way they would never do at this point in this fic if they were awake.

3.) Sex making things MORE complicated, not less.

4.) Sex occurring before one or both of the participants is in love/knows they're in love.

5.) The guy falling in love and knowing he's in love before the girl.

1. Comment on this post.
2. I tell you a letter.
3. Think of 5 (or more if you want) book or movie characters and post their names and your comments on these characters in your LJ.

The letter I was given was G
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fannish5 has had some awesome prompts these last couple of weeks that I haven't been able to get to. Today was too perfect to pass up, especially after last night:
Five reasons your OTP/a favorite pairing belong together.

(I'm doing Kakashi/Sakura, as I'm sure you could have guessed.)

1.) Kakashi= hot
Sakura=hot
Kakashi/Sakura=hot like burning.

What, this stuff matters!

2.) They're both lifers, in a way that neither Sasuke or Naruto are. Kakashi comes from a ninja family, and then after losing his parents, his sensei, his teammates, and anyone else who could come under the auspice of 'loved one', he stuck around Konoha for years serving his village.

No one except for me and raskaka seems to remember this, but Sakura - before Ino, before Sasuke, back when it was just her- decided, growing up in a civilian household, that she wanted to be a ninja and serve her village. And then she did.

3.) They're not the lucky ones. Kakashi lost everyone he cared about, and Sakura has had the boy she loved abandon her, her teammate vanish to go off and train, and screwed up her relationship with her best friend. I also infer that she doesn't have a happy homelife, based on how she interacts/interacted with said characters.

To sum up, both she and Kakashi are the kind of people who are going to live and live and live and keep no-dying even when all their friends are gone and they're wishing they had been lucky enough to die with them.

4.) Sakura would help bring Kakashi out of his holding the world at a distance shell and Kakashi would be a bad enough boyfriend that Sakura won't take him for granted, without treating her like Sasuke would. (I think he'd treat her pretty good, actually.)

5.) I'm not sure how to sum this one up.... Okay, the nicest thing that was ever said about Sakura, way back in the Chuunin exams, was when she broke Ino's mindlock, and Kakashi said that Sakura had the same, stubborn, unwilling to give up personality that Naruto did. Yeah, that's right, she was awesome way back before the timeskip, when she was defending the man Team 7 was tasked to protect, and biting Sound nins, and refusing to let her best friend go easy on her. Kakashi really screwed up with training Sakura (and I think he realized it, which then made that problem worse) but I do think he knows it, and he seems to have no problem adjusting his perceptions of her (how quickly he processed her super-strength, for instance). In short, he'd respect her, and she hasn't had to fight for it, specifically, they way she does with Ino and Sasuke. He just saw how hard she was trying for herself and paid attention.

Name five plot points/arcs you hated in fandoms you ordinarily love.



What are your five favorite book cover designs or book cover illustrations?

(I'm going to do five books that had awesome covers they didn't deserve.)

1.) Tithe, Holly Black (not the butterfly one, the one with the awesome fairy girl on it).

2.) Twilight, Stephanie Meyer

3.) Just about every Anita Blake cover ever.

4.) A Great & Terrible Beauty, Libby Bray

5.) That goblin book that i can't remember the title of, with the horrible subtextual rapist is the love interest subtext that screamed so loudly it was practically text.

Both of these are from fannish5:

Name five characters who would make good supervillains (actual current supervillains excluded).

Katara - In a slightly different situation, I could see her doing exactly what Sozin did - conquering the world for the "good" of the world.

L - The only reason he's a hero is that Kira is just so much worse.

Kyoua - he's practically already a supervillian.

Laura Roslin - "I don't make suggestions, Mr. Baltar. If I want to throw a baby out an airlock, I'd say so." Enough said.

V from V for Vendetta. Like L, he's a hero only because of who he's fighting. In a slightly different story, he would be who are heroes struggle against.

What are your five favorite redemption storylines?

1.) Zuko - Avatar

2.) Doyle - Angel

3.) Lust - FMA

4.) Snape - Harry Potter

5.) Wolf - the 10th Kingdom

BSG: the bad boyfriend who I can't seem to break up with. Oh, sure, we end on a bad note, and then I swear I'm done with him, but then a year later I start seeing him around again, and the next thing I know we're back having good sex and angry fights and his motorcycle is parked on my lawn.

So, I cracked and watched the first two episodes of season 4.

Reference post for fairest1. It's Laura Roslin from Battlestar Galactica and Cordelia Chase from Buffy and Angel.

Gacked from a couple of month previous fannish5.
Name five ways you'd kill a character in your fandom (if you had to.)

Dear Kara 'Starbuck' Thrace,

Please regain your awesomeness and stop acting like a hypocritical, cheating bitch. I get marrying someone else the night after the love of your life tell you he loves you and wants no one else, because you have intimacy issues, as well as a nice habit of self-sabotage, but now you're getting annoying.

Snap out of it, and return to being the best pilot and the best shot in the fleet, as well as one kick-ass character.

Falling out of love,
redbrunja

Name 12 fictional characters you would date and/or have sex with (in no particular order) and then then tag 5 people to do the same.

I've been tagged by sand3 so, may I present my boyfriends and girlfriends? (now with bonus picspam) Also, I did 13 because can you really have too much hotness?


Seeing this, it appears I have a glasses fetish. The things you learn about yourself via livejournal. *giggle*

My feet were wet and cold for five hours yesterday.  : - ( And do you know how hard it is to try and convince yourself to ice your foot when you’ve been cold all day long?

And do you know the downside of having three days of paradise, aka, the weekend where you don’t have to do schoolwork? Your brain gets spoiled (what is this wonderous thing known as free time? how did I not know it sooner?) and when you get back to college you have no desire to work, and your brain gets annoyed if you try to do schoolwork fifteen hours a day.

Meme, stolen from hireadd

1 Kara "Starbuck" Thrace (BSG)
2 Inara Serra (Firefly)
3 Jaye (Wonderfalls)
4 Mal (Firefly)
5 Laura Roslin (BSG)
6 Roy Mustang (FMA)
7 Yaone (Sayuki)
8 Max (Dark Angel
9 L (Death Note)
10 Glasses Guy aka Shadow King aka 'Mommy' (Ouran)
11 Hakkai
12 Dean Winchester (Supernatural)




I had to rewrite this after netscape was a bastard. I don't have that kind of extra time, people! Livejournal was also priggish, so that's why there's two cuttags.